News Flash – Neptune Pleased

Neptune Pleased – film at 11

This is Trillian, reporting at 0 04.528′ S, 128 03.167′ W, Pacific Ocean.
Early in the morning on May 8th, 2013 Sailing Vessel RED crossed the Equator into the Southern Hemisphere. The participants reported it was a starry, starry night befitting the occasion of attaining the status of “Shellback”. No longer were the intrepid voyagers “pollywogs”. RED, an old hand at crossing the equator, had no comments.

Festivities included: fine champagne, reportedly delicious food and a poetry reading. As reported by Captain Richard, King Neptune regarded the offering with great pleasure.

Now, let’s go live via satellite to s/v RED: Hello RED? This is Trillian McMillion, How does it feel to be a “Shellback”, does it hurt?

Captain Richard: Well Trillian, it certainly is a change of state, but the champagne does ease the pain.

Trillian: Now that you’ve attained this goal, what’s next? What could compare with such an unusual distinction?

Captain Richard: Conquering French Polynesia! I’ve always wanted to conquer the French, who’ve for many years, farted in my general direction. I’m going to leave ‘French’ Polynesia to the Polynesians!

Trillian: How do you propose exactly to do that?

Captain Richard: Drink all their wine, eat all their baguette’s and cheese. HA! Take that Frenchie!

Trillian: Do you have any assistance in this venture?

Captain Richard: Sadly, only with the baguette’s and cheese. First Mate Frances denouncing the French in her French Canadian heritage, is more of a gin and tonic’s girl. But don’t pity me in my quest, I’ll enlist the assistance of other cruisers in the wine consumption.

Trillian: Do you expect the victory to be easily accomplished?

Captain Richard: Well, I’ve been training for this most of my life. And my cruising friends as well. It may be a protracted battle as the French are very resourceful with regard to wine. But in the end, the wine will be consumed!

Trillian: Not to give away your strategy, but when do you expect to begin this conquest of the French in French Polynesia?

Captain Richard: T minus 8 days and counting.

Trillian: Well crew of sailing vessel RED, we wish you well in your voyages and quests. For now, it’s back to you in the studio, Tricia.